Alder's Tone

Baby's first Christmas is something special, something to treasure, as it will never happen again. "Don't go to any trouble" was the stereo request from both Grandmothers. Aye, no more than usual, considering we'll have a queue of babysitters. Got to take advantage!

When we arranged Christmas Junior was still in a crib in our room, so the spare room was our bolt hole. Not wanting to lose this we came up with a plan. And that was for grandparents to stay in a local hotel, rather than have one set in the spare room and the other on my office floor. Then there was the other condition, so as to not have Junior knocked way out of routine with having constant attention, the invasion would be Christmas Eve and the liberation on Boxing Day. One idea mine, other other belonging to MOTS.

With everyone assembled by lunchtime on Christmas Eve, and that includes the Gents who called in on the way home, lunch was a bit pot of soup with rolls fresh from the oven. And we were relegated to the kitchen so all our guests could sit in the dining room. It felt like being 6 all over again.

Christmas Eve didn't have the sparkle that I'm looking forward to, that is the putting Junior to bed, keeping an ear out for excited little children, leaving munchies for Santa and the reindeer. That will start next year, so while I don't want to wish time away it is something I'm wanting sooner rather than later.

We came, we
deliveredChristmas Day was really nice with the full house, and of everybody there I guess I had the best time - "If it's for the little 'un then the big 'un's opening it". After a suitable breakfast (second breakfast for some) the unwrapping started. There was almost a break to let Grandad get his nicotine fix, but we managed to complete the pile of empty paper in a mere hour and a half. Not bad going I thought, especially as he's really taken with that pile of paper!

Just before lunch I pointed out that the grandson hadn't got the grandparents anything. "I never noticed" was the resounding cry. Oh well, not to worry, we'll keep these then... Hardly. I do hope the grandparents were made up with the present hand made by their grandson (and foot made too). A hand and foot print from 10 weeks old, Mummy & Daddy got one too but couldn't hang it at the foot of the stairs until after Christmas, for obvious reasons. I love them, and it has a discreet home, yet in a high traffic position. Thus it can go unnoticed yet looked at very frequently. I would guess that the other two will also get a good spot.

There was a nice few hours from Junior in the evening, enough time for Grandad to have his fag breaks, Granny to catch up with the soaps, and Grandma to walk all over everyone at Monopoly. With Grandpops being the last man standing Mummy & Daddy didn't get a look-in. Not even with it being the "Here & Now" edition, which we thought may be too high tech for the wrinklies, but alas no.

Boxing Day was the big goodbyes, leaving us with a house that looks like a tornado has gone through it. I say looks like rather than "looked like" to ensure correct tense. And I'm here on the 31st still wondering when the SWAT team are coming in to clear the mess up. Just a little something I rattled up on Boxing Day morning was a collage of pictures taken over the last couple of days, so there was something extra to take home. I had pictures to choose from with Junior and everybody, except Daddy. Daddy was the only person not to have his picture taken with the boy on the day. It really doesn't bother me as I had a massive amount of time with him cuddled into me asleep, which made my Christmas.

Christmas started around 8 weeks early with getting the prints done. And now it's all over for another year. But if next year is half as good as this year, I'll be a happy Daddy.

Finally, many thanks to the grandparents for being there to share in Junior's first Christmas, it would not have been anything as special without them.

Posted by Alder at 30 December 2006 | Permalink | Comments (1)

Apolgies Lee, it has been far too long since I managed to get onto the site and do my "weekly" update! I had had big plans, every Saturday morning I would grab an hour and update everyone on how Sarah is doing with Junior Gent, every Saturday I would find myself either in Babies R Us, Mothercare, Homebase or on my way to Glasgow to some Pram Centre that a certain Curtis family told my wife about - thanks for that guys! :o) And so it is that I now find myself in the third trimester and I have the whole of the 2nd one to summarise in a shortish post! A lot has happened...

...yup, we entered the third trimester on the 23rd December! At the risk of sounding like Richard Wilson "I donnnnnt bellllliiiiiiiieve itttt!" That 2nd trimester flew by, you promised me it wouldn't Lee, promised! Dont get me wrong, I cant wait to meet Junior and Sarah cant wait to get labour out of the way, but we have so much we need to do first!

Anyway slow down eh, here's what we did in the 2nd trimester.

We bought the pram from Glasgow Pram centre. Its got mod cons, convertible this, clip on that and a GSOH. The GSOH is that it's easy to use when others do it but when I try it you're having a laugh. I'm happy with it - its a Pliko Pramette which is an anagram of "Top Prat Like Me"- seems apt. Try it...

Junior had its first holiday, it flew to Sweden. Whilst sitting at Prestwick airport at 7.30am on October the 30th I was swigging my second super size Stella Artois (I dont like flying). Sarah looked at me and smiled - I think I just felt something she said. Thats funny I replied, so do I - and I rushed to the toilet. Sweden was fantastic, I was kicked in the face many times but loved every minute as I felt my child for the 1st time.

Other purchases in the 2nd trimester included a dresser, a carpet for the nursery, a radiator for the nursery, a child on board teddy bear, wipes, nappies, paint for the nursery and a cuddly toy (I'm getting all Larry Grayson!). Many many purchases and a savings account being hit left right and centre!

We also bought the cot - well in fact my parents did but we chose it, eventually. Another trip to Glasgow Pram centre, then John Lewis in Glasgow, then Babies R Us in Livingston before returning home dissapointed and finding it on the internet 15 minutes later. If at first you dont succeed, sod it, use google and let it come to you.

Another thing that happened in the 2nd trimester was Sarah got a little, well, dippy. How we laughed as she forgot to take home turkey from her mothers at Christmas, we laughed till we cried at her coming into a room, looking at me and then walking out, and we chortled hysterically as she stopped at the green light at Sheriff Hall round about causing a Toyota to swerve around her and then started driving again when it turned red causing a large Tescos truck to hit the brakes and sound its horn at us. Once I could breath again and did ask what was going on - apparently I had put her off I was speaking to her. I am now a mute passenger. I have also not found colour blindness in ANY book about pregnancy, not one!

We attended our first antenatal class - the midwife talked for 30 minutes about how hard labour could be, how women would not get any sleep in the ward, how depressing it could be etc. As the kleenex came out she left and the physio came in. She talked about some of the exercises the women could do, some of which were fun to try as the bloke. Especially the pelvic floor excercises! "Imagine you are holding in a pee for 10 seconds and let it out" she said. I felt like shouting "Imagine?? Try every Friday night out in the taxi coming home at the end of the night! My pelvic is trully floored!". I have signed up for fathers to be classes - will keep you posted on how they go. Sarah has her antenatals in January. I have also signed up for 3 fillings and a wisdom tooth to be removed - thats another story though.

Sarah has grown a lot in the past 3 months. Her bump is now very much on show! She still looks great with it, her hairs lovely, face is spotless and all in all she is glowing. She also just mentioned she will read this entry when I have posted it. ;o)

Christmas was a funny time this year! Inevitably we thought of future Christmas days - next year Junior will be 9 months old. I cant wait to have a child around to watch opening their stocking, opening their presents, throwing them all to one side and playing with the wrapping paper! In all seriousness we have talked a lot about it and I said to my own dad yesterday how I would not spoil the kid - he just smiled.

One major event this trimester was that we picked names! After countless Pop Idol vote type moments where one unlucky contender went home dissapointed we narrowed it down to one boys name and one girls. I know Lee and Debs had a number to choose from on the day but for me I could not do that - I am USELESS at making decisions and the child would have remained nameless for months if I had not done it up front. As for looking like its name, I will settle for it looking like me to be honest!! We have not had milk for 6 months...

As a summary of the second trimester I would say it all hit home over the past 3 months! All of a sudden the excitement of first knowing led to "Oh S**t, what do we do now?". The answer was make lists, buy things and panic (me more than Sarah I think). I think the third will be similar. Dont get me wrong, the excitement is still there, but there is more thinking around the practicalities. Sarah is concentrating on labour, I am thinking about the next 18 years. I have bought too many books and read too far in advance. For the third trimester it is time to pull in the reins, slow down and get the essentials done. Right, I am off to buy Gina Fords Book of Good Weaning...

March 18th here we come......fast.

Merry Christmas and I hope you all have a great 2007!

Posted by ChrisGent at 26 December 2006 | Permalink | Comments (3)

We're almost set for Christmas, the decks are being cleared ready for the invasion. Sounds a bit like Dunkirk, just hope it's not! Poor Jared, having a house full and no baby's first Christmas as an excuse. That's what you get for sending me pictures of pints of Tetley's and Seabrooks crisps!!!!

Anyway, here we go, all systems ready, all rooms tidy, I'm looking forward to this, all pigs fed and ready to fly.

Merry Christmas to all and see you on the other side..

Posted by Alder at 23 December 2006 | Permalink | Comments (1)

It's that time of year for the Christmas Specials, so who has won the wallet awards and who just scraps around for the change?

Find out in the Alder's Tone Christmas Winners & Losers Awards. Don't get excited, no long speaches, no tears on stage, no thanking Auntie Betty's dog's trainer's cousin's maid for looking after the tea.

Winners
Starbucks. A quiet haven in the major panic that is the Christmas shopping rush. So much so we have dedicated our java spend unto them and got a Starbucks card.

Toys R Us. A couple of great offers that have been so tempting, but to buy three games when you just want the one just to get one free, well, it does make sense but then again it doesn’t. And with something practical on offer all the time there’s reasons to keep going in for a look.

play.com*. Despite a large order being dispatched as individual items over a two day period, everything arrived within a reasonable time. They key phrase being “everything arrived”.

And, in depth, the losers…
The management at Fort Kinnaird, Edinburgh. Or rather lack of management at Fort Kinnaird. Traffic chaos, eejit drivers who have no clue what a one-way car park system is, or what a disabled space is, or a parent and child space, 4x4s clogging up the pavement areas, lazy bastards parking in the aisles instead of finding a space, all helped by the fact there is no traffic management in the car park to keep things flowing. And the bricks and mortar retail sector wonders why we turn to the online stores? Just look outside the door, that’s why.

Pier, George Street, Edinburgh. On a quick visit with the family this lunchtime we needed to go downstairs. Not a problem, there’s a lift. However, the lift was occupied by a large stack of shopping baskets, but with enough room for the pram and one of us. On exiting the lift downstairs, a young (and as it transpired blissfully ignorant) member of staff who stared at us coming out of the lift proceeded to put a chair in the lift. The chair was still there a few minutes later when we needed the lift to go back upstairs, so MOTS duly dumped the chair back on the shop floor, leaving the baskets as they were. The member of staff in question was nowhere to be seen.

Directusbstore / Royal Mail. MOTS placed an order, chased it twice, got two responses on the same thread stating despatch on the 4th and the 6th. So which one? And an item was wrong. And Royal Mail attempted delivery on the 7th but failed to leave a card, there was a great risk of it being returned as recorded items are only kept for one week. Thankfully it was still there, so when we finally got the tracking number I managed to collect it. MOTS is still waiting to hear regarding the incorrect item.

* No links in here for play.com, if you want to visit play.com click here and follow the links for play.com, it all helps Richard over at filmstalker!

Posted by Alder at 19 December 2006 | Permalink | Comments (2)

It never really sank in when people used to say "enjot it while it lasts" because you hear that so often in so many contexts. But when it comes to the newborn child it couldn't be more true.

At 16 weeks old, Junior is growing so fast, both in size and as a person. Yes, a person!

First off, the size. At birth he was 7lb 7.5 ozs in old money, came home slightly lower (but not near the maximum 10% permitted drop) and since then it's been on the up ever since with no respite. I could be talking about myself here, but alas not, still talking about Junior.

He's been on the 50th percentile for weight and the 75th percentile for height (length) all the way through, so he's sticking to the growth charts perfectly.

Bigger...Bigger...BiggestWhat does this mean then? Well, a couple of angles to look at it. The mathematical and the mathematical. In terms of percentiles his weight means that 50% of babies his age are lighter then him, and 50% heavier, so he's bang in the middle. For length there are 75% shorter than him and 25% longer than him, so he's on the longer side. In proportion he's the opposite to his daddy who is more heavy than long.

The other mathematical can be measured in many ways, but it all boils down to the same thing. He's "retiring" a lot of clothes at the moment, we're squeezing him into the largest of his "up to 3 months" clothes while boxing up the smaller ones. His vests are almost off-the-shoulder numbers now, but being a true Yorkshireman "there's wear in them yet". Weigh the clothes, price the clothes, do what you will, it all boils down to £££££££££££££ that we need to spend to get his wardrobe sorted out. Now he's too big for the crib he's moved full time into his cot, filling the pram, car seats looking like the inserts will have to come out shortly. All extra £££££££££.

As a person he's getting his major motor skills tuned. No that's not him getting into fast cars, but perfecting the art of moving. He's showing signs of wanting to roll, but with the norm being from front to back first that will be a challenge as he does not like being on his tummy. Grip has come along in the last couple of weeks, really quickly in the last week. The toys on his bouncy chair are fair game, as are the dangling toys on his play mats. The whacking has changed to grabbing, with one hand initially but we're seeing two handed attempts along with some two handed successes. Just pull a little harder on that one son and it'll play a tune. Sitting up isn't a problem any more as long as there's suitable support, and the head is upright for longer periods. And next week the dash down the left wing before following the cross and he shoots, he SCORES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, his favourite TV show at the moment is Match of the Day.

The best part about being a dad at the moment is coming home, being recognised, and seeing the joy on that little face as he welcomes his daddy home, genuinely pleased to see me. I didn't get that in the newborn stage, so there are positives to this development lark.

Weaning. No there's something to look forward to, food everywhere, shit everywhere, what joy we have to come. We're not there yet. What's that, a letter inviting MOTS to the weaning class? Oh fuck, here we go...

So yeah, newborns. Not for long at all. Enjoy it while you can.

Posted by Alder at 12 December 2006 | Permalink | Comments (3)

We have a child prodigy! It's official! According to Nationwide, at least.

According to them our 15 week old son can handle his finances on his own, can understand the function of the PIN and password scheme, and can actually read.

Nationwide have a very dubious policy of allowing customer information to leave their data centres on, worst of all, laptops. This is shocking enough, but when one of those laptops gets stolen and the company who loses it puts the onus on the customer to protect their personal details, well I no longer want to consider doing business with that company.

The theft happened months ago, and Nationwide failed to make the theft public for quite some time, "for security reasons". Well, "for security reasons" you shouldn't allow thieves into your data centres, which is exactly what happened when you allowed a customer database to leave the premises on a laptop. I can see why Nationwide kept it quiet. Imagine if it was made public immediately, every stolen laptop would be the focus of major hack attempts. The chances are this was scrubbed and resold without the thieves actually knowing the true hidden value of their swag.

Nationwide have written to their customers, not apologising, but as I say shifting the onus of security to the individuals. Even Junior got a letter this week, despite not (a) being a customer or (b) even being born at the time of the theft.

Reading at 15 weeks? Daddy's proud to have a different child!Nationwide know his date of birth, they have a copy of his birth certificate. They know he's too young to read, never mind know what a PIN or a password is. Yet they write to him telling him the importance of keeping them secret. So was this just a blanket letter to account holders with no regard to their age? No, if it was I could have understood it. In big bold letters acrosss the top was the message for him to read it carefully, then pass it to a parent or guardian for them to read too.

Nationwide did take into account he's a child, but did not take into account he was too young to read. So not only do they not care about customers personal details, they don't bother to look at them before writing either.

Needless to say the written response I will send them will be something suitably sarcastic, pointing out his new found "child prodigy" status.

Posted by Alder at 11 December 2006 | Permalink | Comments (1)

Health is always a worry, especially for someone who eats too much, exercises too little, and is a prime candidate for diabetes due to the sedentary lifestyle. Is it lifestyle, or hereditary, or what? Well, I just keep the blinkers on and take the line "it depends what books you read".

So the news I got last night that my father is in intensive care with pancreatitis was first and foremost met with fear, a fear for my son. The multitude of "what if..." scenarios went through my head with respect to hereditary ailments. Thankfully, it doesn't look like I have too much to worry about on that score for Junior after looking it up, but being under exercised and over weight I decided to go for a diabetes test today, mainly prompted by the news my father has been borderline for the last 2 years.

Health - don't leave
it to Chance...Lloyds pharmacies do the test for free, on a walk-in basis. 5 minutes to fill in the consent form, do the test, and get the advice was all it took. The only advice I was given was to retest every two years, as my result was well in the safe zone. Not bad for a bloater like me, so I'm happy with that, safe in the knowledge that despite diabetes being present in both sides of the family I’m not in imminent danger. I am in imminent danger of changing the lifestyle, though, to reduce the risk of that changing, which is a shame considering I’ve just bought a lovely jacket that might not fit for much longer if I do.

Now while there’s no love lost between me and my father, ie I haven’t spoken to him in nearly 2 decades and having last seen him at my grandfather’s funeral 15 years ago, the only thing I have missed out on through this is not knowing what medical ailments I have to watch out for, and that has crossed my mind on numerous occassions. But in reality I could get hit by the number 37 bus tomorrow and that worry would be removed.

While I’ve missed out on a very small portion of my life through this, my father has clearly missed out on a massive amount. Such as my coming of age, going to university, graduation, engagement, marriage, having kids, Junior’s first Christmas and everything that will follow. I’ve seen a close friend and his dad fall out (dad’s fault, as per), and he’s missing out too despite living two streets away. While it’s too late for mine, I’d say to “GB” to grovel and apologise until you’re blue in the face, hands and knees job, start accepting responsibility for your actions (who would leave his daughter-in-law just before Christmas with no water downstairs at 8 months pregnant?) before you die a stubborn, bitter, spiteful and despised man.

My guest author put it well to me in an email today, having sent him a list of my irrational worries that I have for my son’s health and the general future of the world he’ll live in.

The worries:

how much is he going to pay for gas, when will it run out, will he afford to go to uni, will the global domination of religious fundamentalists take hold before he embraces atheism, will his national anthem be the star spangled banner, will the world he lives in be waterworld or mad max or terminator

And the response:

Gas will be replaced by nuclear power and we will alll look like the ready brek advert, you will pay for uni not him, religion will be replaced by computerism and the worship of the PS9, the national anthem will be "I'm Lovin it" and feature Ronald McDonald, teach him to sail and to ride go karts.

Which reminds me, is my guest author still registered to post entries?

Posted by Alder at 08 December 2006 | Permalink | Comments (2)

The time comes when that happy smiling face turns into the red face of the devil incarnate. And that is called teething.

Junior is showing some of the symptoms just now, with a bit of dribbling, desire to constantly suck and chew his hands, flush cheeks, irritable for no reason, sleep patterns not quite right (although he is sleeping a solid 8 hour night).

Gnasher's coming?I found this website which explains the process and symptoms pretty well. What I don't like about the site is the fact it says symptoms could be present for 2 months for a tooth appears.

2 months? WHAT? I just hope the symptoms he's showing so far are only an early warning, that he's not really teeting, that he's really going to stay a happy and content baby and that he's going to be the freak that pops his gums overnight with the blink of an eye.

I could, of course, win the lottery this weekend.

Posted by Alder at 05 December 2006 | Permalink