Alder's Tone

Three events this week that show our little boy is just that, rather than a baby. Every couple of weeks it is the same - "he's really come on in the last couple of weeks". This weekend we had three things showing us yet again that he's growing up. And as these are horrifying, I'll put them against horror films.

Fear of stairsSaturday. There's a scene in The Hand that Rocks the Cradle where, walking downstairs into the basement, a hand appears through the open-backed riser and grabs an ankle. So are we talking about stairs? Oh yes. Monkey boy made an attempt at climbing the stairs, with a degree of success. One knee up on the first tread, second knee up and that's our first stair climbed. He clearly was overcome with the lack of oxygen at such an altitude and climbed back down again. Which just goes to show he'll never have the urge to go up Everest or anything.

Fear of swimmingSunday. Has to be Jaws. Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water... the pool we went to had re-opened the previous day after being closed for maintainence. Given this was Monkey boy's first swimming trip MOTS was expecting a grand total of 10 minutes in the pool before the screaming started and everyone started yelling "SHARK". He was more of a Chief Brodie, liking the water so much that after half an hour we was still wanting to be in it. Well, more like the mayor who wanted everyone to stay in the water, but Chief Brodie was a nicer guy so I'd rather he was more like Brodie. The only reason we thought "time to go" was the dorsal fin coming towards us. And the fact Monkey boy was getting tired.

Fear of bathingSunday. A double-bill matinee. With the earlier swimming session an early bath was called for. Now bathtime is something to behold. Hair washed, body washed as quickly as possible, then lie flat on the back for an extended period of leg kicking and serious splashing. Except the last bath the other night, he just wouldn't lie down. He was tired at the time so we thought nothing of it. Until last night, with the same situation again. Lie on my back? No danger. I want to be on my knees, sat, on my belly, twsiting round. Backs are for babies. And with that we realised that our baby was becoming a boy, with his own thoughts and preferences, the end of a bath-time chapter. So, the film? A fear of all things shower and bath? There can be only one screaming in the shower scene.

This post was written and published by Norman Bates.

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Picture sent in by Snoopy, 30 June 2007:

Posted by Alder at 25 June 2007 | Permalink | Comments (1)

I do wonder about that boy of mine sometimes. He shows signs of real intelligence, then follows it up with something really dumb. Tonight's mutterings show both of these in one act.

Too many blondes? NEVER...Let's set the scene here. Hollyporn. Need I say more? Quite apt I nicked an image from C4 that is pertinent to the boy's faux pas this evening.

Hollypornoaks has to be one of the most useless bits of television going. It's basically Baywatch in Cheshire. But it works. And I'd challenge any red-blooded male to watch anything else at 6:30. Why 6:30? Because they can. Perfect timing, with dads getting home from work, what's on before the news? Ahh, Hollyoaks. But I'm only watching it to pass the time before the Channel 4 news, honest.

Where do they grown them? Not in Cheshire, that's for sure. I drove through Cheshire once, stopping at a motorway services, and I can guarantee I never saw anything resembling the Hollyoaks babes.

And then there's Jess, the student who has no idea what shoulders are. Shoulders in clothing that is, her own are always exposed. Not even our lass was that "well dressed" at uni. In fact, none of the students were ever that well dressed. Some of them weren't even dressed at all.

It's a fantasy land. Mainly for the sad dads out there. And I know full well I can list a number of male friends who know exactly that's the truth, but "watch it for the drama". As do I. After all, there's the odd murder and attempted murder, so it must be drama, right?

Tonight's episode had a scene with Justin and Warren's younger sister (just in town), Katy. The boy is stood by the TV unit, holding on to the TV base to steady himself. He's been stood there for a while, getting cocky showing off at being able to stand up and stay standing up with no help from his parents but from the odd bit of furniture.

So there he is, a mere 6 inches away from a 37 inch LCD TV with the above scene on it, pretty much that exact image. As you can well imagine Katy must look huge to him. At this, with him looking up, I'm proud that he's showing signs of being a chip off the old block. And then comes the dumb part. He scanned his eyes down the side of the TV. Down past all the buttons. Realising he has a free hand (as he's holding on to the TV unit with just one hand - remember, getting cocky) the aforementioned free hand reaches out, one finger extended. Then the TV goes black. No sound. No larger than life Katy. NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Does he realise there was serious totty-watching to be had, and he just switched it off? He'll learn. Oh, he'll learn.

Posted by Alder at 20 June 2007 | Permalink | Comments (2)

Happy father's day out there to all dads, especially to the first timers like myself, and those not quite there but know they'll be celebrating it next year. For those in the latter category, ie Graham, congratulations!

Happy Father's Day...It's been the most covered topic of conversation in our house this last week or so, more than Mother's Day was in March. The first half of the year covers most things for us, with my birthday first, MOTS' birthday close behind, then Mother's Day and finally Father's Day.

With my days are at either end of the spectrum it means there's competition to be had. MOTS makes the opening bid with my birthday, to which I get a quick return. Then I can choose to raise when it comes to Mother's Day. But then the final trump can come in June for Father's Day.

As long as I get a card and some quality playtime with my boy then that's all it'll take to make me happy. Anyhting else is just material.

I got an early card on Wednesday. I was putting his nursery report book back in his back when it jammed on something, on inspection it was a hand-made card from nursery in his bag wishing me a Happy Father's Day. It was made by the older kids, written by the staff, and there was a scrawl of pen at the bottom. That's the first thing he's ever written, even we haven't tried him with a pen in his hand for any card signing yet. Totally made my day on Wednesday did that, I was grinning like a Cheshire cat all day.

Posted by Alder at 17 June 2007 | Permalink | Comments (1)

Junior's room faces slightly North-West, getting full sun at this time of year from mid afternoon into early evening before the sun drops behind the trees of the local wood. Needless to say it gets a bit warm in there, and very light, which isn't too great for a 9 month old trying to sleep.

So blackouts are the answer?

Measure twice,
cut once.We have blackout curtains that sit behind your normal curtains on the same hangings, but these are on a wooden pole sitting some short distance from the wall, so gets light bleeding in around the edges, ALL edges. With the hight of summer approaching, apparently, then this won't be ideal. So what about blackout blinds?

IKEA's blinds, £18.99 for our window size, cut down, installed like a breeze. Why? Because we measured twice and cut once. That was for both the measuring of the gap the aluminium pole had to fit between, and the pole itself before cutting. First attempt at fitting, spot on.

Now, who do I know that had the opposite experience? Hmm...... Measure once, cut too short? Ring any bells? Sorry, Chris, had to be done....

Posted by Alder at 10 June 2007 | Permalink | Comments (2)

Thanks, Richard, saw on the FOB that there's an MT 4 beta on the go. I'll get this up and running so the blog may be a little unpredictable for a few days while I upgrade and configure and generally get used to it. I'll post a comment when it's complete.

Posted by Alder at 08 June 2007 | Permalink | Comments (1)