I wonder about that boy
I do wonder about that boy of mine sometimes. He shows signs of real intelligence, then follows it up with something really dumb. Tonight's mutterings show both of these in one act.
Too many blondes? NEVER...Let's set the scene here. Hollyporn. Need I say more? Quite apt I nicked an image from C4 that is pertinent to the boy's faux pas this evening.
Hollypornoaks has to be one of the most useless bits of television going. It's basically Baywatch in Cheshire. But it works. And I'd challenge any red-blooded male to watch anything else at 6:30. Why 6:30? Because they can. Perfect timing, with dads getting home from work, what's on before the news? Ahh, Hollyoaks. But I'm only watching it to pass the time before the Channel 4 news, honest.
Where do they grown them? Not in Cheshire, that's for sure. I drove through Cheshire once, stopping at a motorway services, and I can guarantee I never saw anything resembling the Hollyoaks babes.
And then there's Jess, the student who has no idea what shoulders are. Shoulders in clothing that is, her own are always exposed. Not even our lass was that "well dressed" at uni. In fact, none of the students were ever that well dressed. Some of them weren't even dressed at all.
It's a fantasy land. Mainly for the sad dads out there. And I know full well I can list a number of male friends who know exactly that's the truth, but "watch it for the drama". As do I. After all, there's the odd murder and attempted murder, so it must be drama, right?
Tonight's episode had a scene with Justin and Warren's younger sister (just in town), Katy. The boy is stood by the TV unit, holding on to the TV base to steady himself. He's been stood there for a while, getting cocky showing off at being able to stand up and stay standing up with no help from his parents but from the odd bit of furniture.
So there he is, a mere 6 inches away from a 37 inch LCD TV with the above scene on it, pretty much that exact image. As you can well imagine Katy must look huge to him. At this, with him looking up, I'm proud that he's showing signs of being a chip off the old block. And then comes the dumb part. He scanned his eyes down the side of the TV. Down past all the buttons. Realising he has a free hand (as he's holding on to the TV unit with just one hand - remember, getting cocky) the aforementioned free hand reaches out, one finger extended. Then the TV goes black. No sound. No larger than life Katy. NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Does he realise there was serious totty-watching to be had, and he just switched it off? He'll learn. Oh, he'll learn.
Comments
Oh my I was gearing up for something awful, like he pulled the LCD over or something.
Oh, and Zed watches Hollyoaks with me. There aren't just gorgeous women you know, there's gorgeous men too.
(Note that I don't say anything about scripting)
That said it does some cool things with the start of episodes, the odd cool camera bit, and some of the characters are great fun.
Yeah Lee, the boobies are nice too!
Posted by: Richard Brunton | June 20, 2007 10:39 PM
There are men in Hollyoaks? Well I never, every day's a school day!
Posted by: Lee | June 21, 2007 1:06 PM